Confession: Depression (my personal war)

Ok, where do I start?

There are those of you who already know I have been diagnosed with Depression. I have been actively and passively dealing with it in many different ways since 2005. But it's not over, it will probably never be over, and I need to talk about it.

SO. I have decided to use this blog as a means to do that. Up until now, this blog has been for sharing my CREATIONS, because I feel directed to do so - it's a big part of me! (Also, it's my source of income. LOL.) But I think there is a place on this blog for another part of me that has been quietly hiding, needing a voice. Her name is Depression (mine is a "she/ her" - so I will refer to my Depression as such). Why not combine them in one place? After all, they really do go hand in hand. For me, anyways. We just don't always talk about the other one. Just the word itself is depressing. Are we ashamed? Do we just not want others to know? It's a little awkward, talking about things that bring us JOY in the same sentence as the times we want to crawl in a hole and hide or die.

I can do this, after all, it's my blog. I hope I don't lose people because of it. I guess if I do, I do. 

But maybe if you are thinking of leaving, instead you just stick around for a second because you are curious - how are Depression and Creations related? Did you know that most art is created from someone's pain? The real good stuff usually is. Sometimes the fact that you have ART in front of you is evidence that some "artist" went through something that caused them to create something that ultimately taught them something that they now want to share! 

Or maybe you come to this blog BECAUSE you need to see these connections, and you can benefit from them, either for yourself, or trying to understand someone else who knows Depression.

Or maybe you can gain a little insight into what might work for you personally, in your war against Depression. Maybe we sufferers can bond in a new way, and help each other fight it, together.  

This addition to my blog voice is not meant to bring anyone down, seriously. Why would anyone do that on purpose? But I have a nagging inside me that says IT IS TIME. I need to SHARE, to talk about reasons behind why I do what I do. And to create a place for others to share, maybe...eventually?

I have been medicated, then non-medicated, and now medicated again, I am finally getting a personal therapist, I actively read all the books, I listen to the podcasts, I watch the YouTube channels, I have suffered all the sleep issues, I have found solutions that work for a while, and other solutions that work longer and better. I want to talk about all those things. But I especially want to share how CREATING THINGS has been my most constant therapy, my go-to battle plan for Depression. Honestly, it really has been the thing that has brought me the most joy, my whole life, ever since I was little.

Please join me...not only on my design journey, creating beautiful things that bring JOY, but also the journey of discovering how Depression is usually the catalyst behind these Creations, and ultimately the enemy I fight, and how I CAN win in that fight. I don't win every battle, but I think, I have HOPE, that I can win the war.  Please join me...let's create an army, it's not so fun alone.

Julie

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